my life…in text format

Entries categorized as ‘church’

Can You Learn Life Lessons from A Mouse?

April 7, 2008 · 1 Comment

By no means am I a perfect person. As a matter of fact, I tell people all the time that I can’t believe I’ve been privileged to do some of the things I have the amazing opportunity to do because I am such a flawed human being. Saying you are flawed though has kind of become a cliche in some ways. It’s a pseudo-humility so people will think you are humble when in reality you are quite proud that you are so flawed, because it makes you seem so human.

That being said, I won’t belabor the fact that we are all flawed. You know it. I know it. Which is the beauty of this post.

Recently, I was talking with a friend and she was describing a trip she was getting ready to go on. A six day vacation to see some friends and I am excited for her and wanted to hear more about it. So I asked, “What are you expecting from this trip?”

That’s an important question, I think. “What are you expecting?” We’ll come back to that later.

To be honest, I was expecting to hear a long silence as she contemplated what I thought was a difficult question but she answered almost immediately with a series of things she was expecting to happen while on this trip. As she was laying out the things she wanted to happen and what she wanted to get she said these words, “Hopefully something happens spiritually.” Those words struck me. Not because she wanted something to happen spiritually, which I think is great, I hope something happens spiritually for her too. The word that struck me in that sentence was the word “hopefully.”

I think I can honestly say that one of my least favorite combinations of words in the English language are the words that form the phrase, “All Hope Is Lost.” I don’t think there is a more tragic statement a human being can utter than when they say they’ve lost all hope. It’s interesting to me because the word LOST can mean a lot of things.

When you hear the word lost, there are several different things that come to mind. Pastors talk about “lost souls” all the time, some people immediately start thinking about ABC’s hit TV show, still others hear the word and they think it’s an exact description of what they feel about themselves. But when it’s attached to the word “hope” what is really being said?

It’s certainly possible to misplace your hope. To put your hope in the wrong things and to expect one thing to give you something else entirely. That’s why people empty bottle after bottle of alcohol or jump from meaningless relationship to another. But I don’t think misplacing hope is what is really being said when the word “lost” is attached to the word “hope.” I can misplace my keys, forget about them and lose them. Searching around my house frantically trying to find what I had lost while they are sitting right where I left them. I had just misplaced them. Misplaced hope is still hope. So when we say “all hope is lost” it’s even more tragic then putting that hope in the wrong thing.

Lost hope is the thing that drives the girl to sit in her room alone, with the shades drawn and the music loud as she drags a blade across her skin in order to relieve herself of the pain that hope in the wrong thing had created. Lost hope is when a young man experiences abandonment from his father at a young age and slowly but surely sinks deep into himself, never being able to become the man that God intended Him to be. Quietly, subtly, he lives the life of a dissatisfied shell of his former self because hope was lost long ago.

What are we risking when we say, “I’ve lost hope.”?

Have you ever felt that all hope was lost?

I don’t like the phrase “All Hope Is Lost” because while hope certainly can be misplaced, it is something that belongs to people and it is one of those things that is difficult to take, but is given away by the owner. Hope can be battered and bruised and abused, absolutely. Hope can allow us to put ourselves in situations that will undoubtedly hurt is in the future. But we enter them anyway, in hope that what we are afraid will happen….won’t happen.

If you are a hopeful person, you’ve probably been hurt. Because hope is the thing that kind of drives us beyond risk.

“I hope he won’t hurt me.”

“I hope it’s worth it.”

“I hope I don’t fail at this.”

Those are statements with huge risk attached but hope is what gives us justification to run into them anyway. It makes it seem possible. Hope.

Call me an optimist but I don’t think hope is taken from people. I think hope is given away. I think the nature of hope gives the holder of said hope the power to believe or to give up.

One of my favorite movies, Catch Me If You Can, has a story that recurs throughout the movie about two mice that felt into a bucket of cream. One mouse quickly gave up a drowned, the other mouse swam and swam so hard and so long that it eventually churned that cream into butter and crawled out. One mouse lost hope, the other mouse refused to give up or lose hope and kept fighting even though all logic pointed to the fact that it was going to die. It believed there was a different way and it struggled and fought until it had enough leverage to crawl out of it’s mess.

I love the word hope because even though we are all flawed, we can choose to hope beyond hope. We can choose to believe that something great will happen spiritually as we take a vacation away from the ordinary.

I want to sit here and type the words, “When all hope is lost, we can still hope” because that’s how powerful hope is. Of course, that doesn’t make sense grammatically but hope is kind of an anti-logic. That’s what makes it so beautiful.

If it weren’t for Jesus Christ, I would be condemned to separation from my Creator forever. But since Jesus Christ came to earth, died a death I deserved to die and was raised from the dead, I can HOPE in Jesus. I can hope that my life is bigger than the breaths I breathe each day and I am meant for more than just a short stint on this ball of dirt. I can hope.

The Bible says that it is impossible to please God without faith. It also says that faith is the substance of things we hope for and evidence, the truth, the things that point to the things we can’t see. Without hope, you can’t have faith.

Hope is one of the ingredients of faith.

I love that. Because I can choose to hope beyond hope or I can choose to stop swimming and drown.

Don’t forget that hope isn’t something stolen from you, it’s something you give away. Don’t give your hope away.

Faith. Hope. Love.

What are you expecting?

::

Categories: church · culture · history · hmm... · ministry · thoughts

Little Leadership is Huge

March 27, 2008 · No Comments

I’m sitting, looking at a blank page waiting for me to write something down. I’ve just written something down, it’s not blank anymore, it now has the words I continue to type and I just keep typing hoping to find a good transition into the reason of this post. This post does have a reason, this post is important to me because it has to do with some of my favorite things.

God.

Jesus.

Leadership.

I have the incredible privilege to work in environments that allow me to exercise gifts and talents that God has given me and there are moments when I sit back or breath an exhale of amazement that I actually get paid to do what I do.

Whenever I can experience something that allows me to grow, learn, live and lead better, I get excited because I can literally feel how I am getting closer and closer to God with each baby step I take. Some may call that wishful thinking, I simply call it the faithfulness of a Father that loves unconditionally.

Recently, God has decided to remind me of something that I had lost sight of. It’s a simple phrase with profound meaning and packed full of life changing power that has really caused me to evaluate how I do things.

It’s a principle that I’ve known for almost all of my life and certainly for the majority of my leadership life. Seven words. One sentence. Spoken by one of the first New Testament preachers ever.

“He must increase, but I must decrease.”

I don’t know why that has been echoing in my head so loudly over the past few days.

“He must increase, but I must decrease.”

The word that really stands out to me is that word, “must.”

I just feel such an urgency when I read that. Like it’s so absolutely necessary for me to decrease and God to increase, that’s insane to consider the possibility of it being any other way.

It’s almost like both things need to happen in order for it to work right…

Is it possible for God to increase and you NOT to decrease?

Is there room for both you and God, or does one automatically become smaller as the other one takes precedent. I can easily use the excuse that if I follow God and I increase, than more people will see that I follow God and may come to God, so maybe I can increase and than, by default God will increase because I am getting bigger.

That’s a lie.

It’s simply not true. That phrase, “He must increase, but I must decrease” comes from the New International Version and it has the second “must” in italics which just adds to the urgency.

It’s like, “He really needs to increase, but if anything is really going to happen, you just have to all-out, without-a-doubt, can’t be any other way, HAVE TO decrease.”

It’s almost like the focus isn’t even on God at that point, but more on what WE need to do. Which makes me think that God, just by being God, will fill the gap left as we get smaller and smaller.

We don’t need to worry about God being big, He’s already big. I have to remember that I have the ability to miniaturize God by allowing myself to be big.

I love the idea that as I get smaller, God automatically gets made bigger, because there is no pressure on me to do anything. I don’t have to worry about being successful, I don’t have to worry about what other people think, the only thing I have to really concern myself with when entering into any situation is simply, “How can I allow God to be increase in this situation?”

God has given human beings an amazing amount of responsibility. And what are we to do with that responsibility?

Well, the responsible thing to do is to give it right back to Him.

I’ve met a lot of people who never consider their own soul when they make a choice and it breaks my heart to see so many people with broken souls in need of a healer, a miracle, a Savior. I get in there with what I may consider good advice or wise counsel when in reality, I absolutely must decrease, so that He can increase.

There’s too much at risk for me to worry about being big.

I want to be small.

Very small.

I like being little.

iamnot. He is I AM.

Categories: church · hmm... · leadership · ministry · personal

A Reminder

November 13, 2007 · No Comments

little boy praying

Last night, I was in my room doing some praying. I was feeling distant from God and frustrated at some bad habits I can’t seem to break. They seem to break me more than I break them. I was asking God’s forgiveness and seeking that feeling of grace. You know, when the light breaks through and you feel lighter, lifted, forgiven. It didn’t come. Nor, does it have to. It’s never been about feeling anyway. But, I was looking for that feeling. Just for the confirmation, I guess.

Out of nowhere, I hear some singing coming from downstairs. I stop talking, I listen and I realized it’s my dad. I can’t really hear what he’s singing, but I know it’s him. I walk out of my room feeling frustrated at myself and I hear the words to his song. He’s listening to my iPod and singing along to a new version of a classic hymn. The song he was singing was Amazing Grace. An artist named Chris Tomlin reworked it and put it on his latest album.

Amazing grace
How sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me
I once was lost, but now I’m found
Was blind, but now I see

‘Twas grace that taught my heart to fear
And grace my fears relieved
How precious did that grace appear
The hour I first believed

My chains are gone
I’ve been set free
My God, my Savior has ransomed me
And like a flood His mercy reigns
Unending love, Amazing grace

I lay down at the top of the steps in our hallway and just listen to my dad sing these words. Letting each one sink into my soul. Letting my dad cry out for me. I am in desperate need of Amazing Grace everyday. I can never get enough of it. I never want to stop chasing it, grabbing a hold of it and letting it chase me.

Today, I was faced with that lingering, nagging doubt and fear that I might have missed something. I didn’t pray long enough, I didn’t say the right things. Like it’s my words that forgive me rather than the death of Jesus and the grace of God. Then, while in my office a young boy tapped on my window and asked if he could talk to me.

He wanted to ask me something.

He wanted to know if I could pray for him.

He begins to tell me that his family had been evicted from their house without notice and they are living in a Motel 8. He even pulled out the key card to show me. I was floored. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know how to say whatever it was that I couldn’t figure out to say. I was completely lost.

All he wanted was for me to pray for him.

A child, coming to me to pray. He wasn’t coming to me, he physically came to me, but he was really crying out to God. He just didn’t really know how to. So, I pulled a chair next to him and I began to pray. As I prayed I realized that God sees me in a similar way. I was the one doing the talking, but God was listening to this boy. I was praying for this boy, but it was also a cry out to God myself. God used this young boy to show me how He looks at me.

I try to find the words, I can say nothing to deserve the unimaginable love of God. How can you say enough words to earn a love that would drive someome to die for you? What kind of human language has enough words to equal that?

I was reminded. I am loved. I am forgiven. I need to be broken. I need to repent and turn myself completely over to love. To God. To acceptance. Stop running behind my own words and run behind Jesus.

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound.

Grace speaks louder than words.

For that, I am forever surrendering to God and forever thankful His grace allows it.

Categories: church · culture · hmm... · ministry · personal · safehouse · thoughts · worship

unChristian

October 8, 2007 · No Comments

unchristian book

This books is a must read.

More commentary to come later.

How do you view Christians?
How do people who aren’t Christians view Christians?
How do they view you?

Categories: church · culture · leadership · ministry · thoughts

leadership. culture. church. world.

October 2, 2007 · No Comments

catalyst 07

Good day from Atlanta, GA!

October 3rd starts 3 days of extreme, intense, in your face leadership training that will take a full year to process. I love it. Pics and posts to come soon.

Until then.

Categories: Catalyst · church · culture · leadership · ministry · personal · safehouse

The Glory of It All

September 26, 2007 · No Comments

remedy

This new CD by the David Crowder*Band is fantastic. I just finished it and it’s the David Crowder Band doing what they do, and doing it well. It is said that worship is a lifestyle, these guys live that out and you can tell. I want to jump, shout, kneel, cry, laugh, sing, think, and pray all at the same time when I hear this album. It’s great.

Just go by it. You’ll know what I mean pretty much right away.

David Crowder and the Band…well done. Once again, you lead us into the presence of God. Thanks. I like it here.

Available on iTunes or at davidcrowderband.com

Categories: church · culture · hmm... · ministry · music · personal · thoughts · worship
Tagged: , , , ,

Life On Display

September 19, 2007 · No Comments

camera

Lately I’ve been thinking about this idea of me being a light to the world. It’s a huge responsibility. Something not to be taken lightly. I was reminded of this in one of the strangest ways recently.

A young woman named Justine is part of a growing group of people who are “lifecasting.” I don’t know if you’ve heard of this, but it’s worth checking out, it’s actually oddly addicting. tastyblogsnack.com/live is the live webcast of Justine’s life. She has a web cam that she takes with her during her daily activities (getting coffee, working at her desk, going to clubs) and she willingly and happily broadcasts her life over the internet for the world to see.

She carries on conversations with people that are in her chat room talking and answers questions in real time, she’s just a free lance video editor who has a slightly odd passion for internet, I guess.

What’s interesting to me is that when I started asking myself if I were to broadcast my life over the internet and people could see what I do when no one else is around, what would they see? The answers made me think.

Of course, I would want people to see the same thing they see when I walk into a room ready to hang out, work, go out, whatever. Is that what they would see?

What would they see in you?

It’s questions like these that actually have me considering this lifecasting thing. My life should be an example. An example of the grace of God, the love of God, the passion of Jesus Christ and His saving power.

In reality, my life is on display everywhere I go. So is yours.

What are you broadcasting?

Categories: blog · church · culture · hmm... · ministry · personal · thoughts

September 3, 2007 · No Comments

heart hands

It was great being in church today. We missed three weeks when we were on vacation and it was nice to be back with our community of fellow believers. You don’t realize how important it is to worship with a community of people until you are away from it and come back to it. I missed my extended family. I’m glad to be back.

Categories: church · family · hmm... · ministry · safehouse

Wow

August 7, 2007 · 1 Comment

When we did blacklight dramas at our church, they looked NOTHING like this!

This video is amazing.

Check it out.

Categories: church · ministry · video